Satanists refer to the time of discovering Satanism and beginning to learn about it as ‘First Phase’. This is both a literal reference, as it is your first phase of discovery, but also the behavior that typically comes with it.
The first phaser loves to share this new discovery with everyone they meet. Using the badge Satanists to scare, intrigue, manipulate or endear themselves to others. Rarely do first phasers quietly identify as Satanists and move on through life. There is almost always a rebellion against the life they led up to that point.
The spreading of the ‘good word’ as it were is not the only first phase behavior, ironically being antithetical to the religion they identify with; but also collecting as much ‘Satanic’ paraphernalia as possible. This is not only to prove their passion or devotion to their newfound religion, but to drape themselves in so they look like a Satanist. This allows those who exploit Satanism to stay in business, so it’s not always a bad thing. But the Sigil of Baphomet necklaces, bracelets and rings coupled with the Anton LaVey t-shirts, stickers and memes online are a dead giveaway that you’re kinda new to this whole thing.
The seeking of groups to ritualize with so you can see a nude altar, or trying to find out why your destruction or lust ritual isn’t working even though you followed all the steps in The Satanic Bible are also signs you just don’t quite get it yet. But why stop there when you could collect as many Satanists or Satanist adjacent friends in social media. After all the more Satanists you connect with prove how Satanic you are right?
You go out of your way to verbally bully Islamic-Judeo-Christians for their foolish beliefs in their hypocritical god. Satan’s the best friend they ever had! Doing your damndest to hammer home the idiocy you see in their beliefs, to convince them of their folly. But again, you are pointing yourself in the wrong direction.
All of this behavior reveals that you are so new that you simply don’t really get what Satanism is about. That’s for the next phase. But this isn’t about that, it’s about the death of the first phase, and how we traditionally mourn those we have lost, even if they were lost long ago. I have fond memories of my first phase and though there are moments of embarrassment, there are also reflections of excitement and discovery!
Reading The Devil’s Notebook on the bus, with the whispers and side glances around me. Having girls come up to me talking about how they heard I was a Satanists and they just had to meet me. Having guys pin a good guy badge on their chest for defending my right to be a Satanists when others would talk shit about me behind my back, making sure to share the story with me. Missionaries trying to talk me out of my folly. My parents being convinced Satan was whispering in my ear, turning me against them while ironically pushing me away.
The music that was supposed to be Satanic that was really just bad metal, the clothing that was supposed to be a counter-culture expression becoming a uniform. Looking so much like a pseudo-Satanist, devil worshipper vomited all of my style on me as to be too on the nose like some Satanic nark going in for the bust.
It was fun! I can recognize the ridiculous behavior and still reflect fondly on it.
So sure, I have traded in trying to convince my family of the truth about Satanism with focusing on my professional career, and my metal clothes and jewelry for a more professional appearance, you know, Lesser Magic. I stopped sharing my religion with everyone for an exploration of the religion through studying. The biggest difference as you can see is that instead of emanating Satanism, I am personifying it.
I think we all need to find our way through life, including Satanism, in our own time and way, and when you see yourself moving into a new place, you can be objective enough to reflect on where you came, taking the lessons you learned with you. Satanism isn’t a race, or contest. It’s you. Your journey through this short life, and what you do with the time you have. Make that time as gritty and visceral or crisp and polished as you like. Just make sure that you make it yours.
Hail Satan!